Last night I went to a concert in San Francisco, it doesn't matter which one as that's not the point of this story. We were all packed in, knee to back.. ass to ass.. on metal bleacher seats. The stairs going up and down were narrow and steep.. the crowd was mostly people in their 40's, 50's even 60's.. people not used to or able to navigate the stairs like in youth. A women walking up the stairs spilled her tequila something on both the boy (20 something) behind me and down my back. It was cold, wet and smelled, well, like tequila. It was also quite a shock.. she apologized to the boy and made up some excuse and continued up the stairs. I looked at him with the wet dripping off his right arm and face and used my jacket to mop him off.. without even thinking... and I am smiling here at this moment thinking about my need to just fix it.. so we could all go on having a good time. He seemed a bit surprised by my action and made it a point to tap me on the shoulder a few minutes later to thank me.. twice. It was sweet. I made a joke about how we should have split her drink because by spilling it she should have lost the right to have it.. then he said seriously.. if that had been a man I would have punched him. I paused for a minute to see if there was any indication of violence in this boys face.. I didn't see any.. I felt awkward after he said that and mumbled something in reply. And I've been thinking about it ever since.
What comes to my mind now in hindsight is that I have been on both sides of the drink, the spiller and the wearer. Does the spiller deserve to be punched? My gut says no.. but only because it was not a meditated move, it was just poor balance on her part. In the long run she paid 15$ for a drink that she spilled half of.. isn't she the loser?
Another incident happened on our ride home on the motorcycle between a bicyclist and a car.. mostly between the cyclist and hisself. Lots of traffic, the car edges into the bike lane not seeing the bicyclist and the cyclist hollers out to let the car know he is coming.. as he passes he is pissed and flips the driver the bird and yells Fuck You! I speak up and say to the cyclist as he is pedaling away.. Why so angry? Don't take it so personally.. don't know if her heard me but I hope he did and it gives him some food for thought.
Now, here is where I get a bit weird.. so sorry.. I had this revelation today at the gym.. and here it goes..
We are all connected. We are everyone and everyone is us. We are the spiller, we are the wearer, we are the mistake makers, we are the winners, the losers, we step in shit, we make the grade, we are the fat, we are the fit, we are the smelly, the beautiful, the brave, the weak. No man is better, some are just better off. I hope that if you are reading this that my words reach you and talk you into a better understanding of others.. to help feel less angry and more empathetic towards each other... at any given moment we could be any of us.
